Honoring My Wife

Needless to say my life has gone in a drastically different direction than I could ever have imagined. I truly never believed I would be in the position I am. When Jessica went to be with The Lord she took a very large part of my identity with her. Our dreams, our goals and our future desires were all my dreams, goals and desires…so without her I feel as though I have been reborn in a sense…wiped clean and recreated. I need to find my new identity and create new dreams and goals. That’s terrifying and depressing just to write. There is one thing that Jessica and I agreed about throughout our battle…that when she was healed we would go on a mission trip and volunteer ourselves to people in need. We would give back to glorify God and in the process learn how truly blessed we are and probably grow a great deal more than I can comprehend at this point in my life. Jessica is now Healed. So I’ve decided to stick to our plan and embark on a journey in more ways than one. I will be leaving my job and traveling the world to try and glorify God and honor my wife by helping others in need in her name. My hope is that throughout this journey I will find myself and create new dreams and desires. This is a daunting task and I don’t want to do it…I want my wife back. Since this is not an option though I know with all of my heart that this is the right thing to do. I have so much support and love from so many people…ones who are concerned about me for a variety of reasons. I have been blessed to have a lifelong friendship with a best friend who will accompany me on this journey, Ryan Parmelee. He is leaving his job, moving out of his apartment and giving up more than I know to be by my side throughout my travels. Nobility at this level is a very rare trait. As some of you know I feel very strongly that Jessica is with me and I know this trip will be no different, and that comforts me because we’ll be doing this together…like we planned.

I will be leaving in 4 weeks for South America and then returning for Christmas. Then I head to Central America, Australia and the surrounding areas, Asia, Africa and finally Europe. Our hope is to raise funds throughout our trip so that we can impact the people we help as much as possible. That’s the plan right now anyway so I pray for success, I pray to feel her presence and I pray for God’s grace.