I’m Home

We were ten minutes from touching down and I have never witnessed anything like this before. Rays of light jutting down from the Heavens above…consumed by the sea below like a suckling newborn. We flew right through them, these beams of life that appear to be gifts from God Himself when peered upon from land…a truly wondrous spectacle which would make a believer out of most…the ones that easily slice through puffy clouds so they may bring life to our planet. From the tiny plane window above it seems as if these beams of light were shooting out from the depths of the sea…signals for some alternate universe…only when our shadow jutted across the water below was I confident they were of Heavenly origin. We flew right through them…energy seemed to flow throughout the plane…like a bud springing to life after receiving dawn’s affection to dry away the dew. We actually flew through these rays of hope and my heart swelled, my eyes moistened and my face delighted with a trembling grin…knowing I have been expected…knowing I have been greeted by my love with arms wide open…like a broken soldier welcomed home after a difficult chapter. I have returned to our home away from home…for the first time without her…but with her.

So I’ve arrived to my home for the evening…middle of the rainforest. I saw what I thought was a bird fly right before me walking down a path…it was actually a cricket which was the size of a banana…a f*%€*#g banana. That means in Costa Rica Pinocchio would have been the size of a full grown man…and then grown into some giant only to endure a life in the circus…but he would have probably met Dumbo…which is pretty cool.

Anyway…so I’m sleeping and there’s so much noise outside from birds making that sound they make…“Caulk! Caulk!!” Big dogs running around through the brush like the hunters and scavengers they’re truly meant to be. Then there’s the insects. Yes insects rattling, screeching, thudding, patting, ranting and buzzing. So I am not sleeping terribly well to say the least…its kind of that stressful sleep when you have to catch an early flight and you’re too worried about oversleeping. At around 2am I recall placing my arm by my side only to find out I’m not in my bed alone…I lay it upon some sort of sharp jagged like creature and immediately swipe it away. It then made it’s way to my leg and I had to frightfully escort this half banana sized cricket to the balcony. “Feast you damn birds, Feast!” My heart beat increased quite a bit and I then started to laugh out loud…I wasn’t mad by any means I’m literally in the middle of a jungle…it’s expected. I immediately thought of Jess. I thought of the many times she had a similar experience. Screaming and yelling as her body somehow defies gravity by leaping from a prone position to one of standing…she would dance around shaking off some invisible insect while repeating a bug repellant spell: “Getttttt ittttttt offffff…Getttttt ittttttt offffff…Getttttt ittttttt OFFFFF!!!” What would follow would be the gross shudder dance and chant that everyone does once they think they’re in the clear…they proceed to replicate the “I’m a maniac…a maniac…” choreography while releasing a long and resentful “Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr….”

I would be standing just watching…trying to get my heart beat back to normal after realizing there is no armed intruder trying to crawl into bed with us. I’m just staring like I’m in the presence of the tribe’s medicine-man performing the fertility dance…it was awe inspiring. I’m completing my duties as her husband chanting my counter spell: “It’s nottttttt onnnnn…It’s nottttttt onnnnn…It’s nottttttt ONNNNN!!!!” And finally once things settled down…the bug has lost to the powers of both spell and dance and here we are…negotiation time. “I’m not getting back in that bed. "Honey you have to get back in that bed there’s no other place to sleep. I don’t care I’ll sleep on the floor. Baby where do you think the bug came from in the first place? Ok I’ll sleep in the bed but this is bulls*#t.” Finally back in bed…the now imaginary bugs cause quick hand swipes and “Ewwwwwww….EWW! Baby……..there’s nothing there go back to sleep.”

This made me laugh, made me smile as wished I could cuddle her once more…I wish I could play the heroic guardian from all things that go rattling, screeching, thudding, patting, ranting and buzzing in the night…just once more.